hot mess mom culture

I’m sure you have seen those hot mess mom memes, seemingly bragging about the day’s failures, wearing it like some sort of trophy. It’s like in order not to feel shame in not being able to get it all done, or being all put together there is this sense of comradery in how hard motherhood can be, so let’s just float through it. 

Motherhood is certainly difficult sometimes. There can be really challenging moments, especially when it is new or a lot of transition happening but motherhood is such a gift. 

If we are not intentional about it, it can be very easy to be sucked into the hardness of it all and we can resort to settleing into the ideal that the hot mess mom is just normal. 

Hot Mess Mom relatable?

Sure at times these things can feel relatable. Getting your kids to school on time can be a huge task and pajamas in the drop-off line could easily become the norm. But is this giving God our best?

Are we so overwhelmed in motherhood that we cannot prioritize our time to get a shower and some clean clothes on? 

the day to day ebbs and flows of motherhood can be challenging. Some days are so full you don’t even know how you got to the end of the day. Other days are full of pure joy but when we get too comfortable in the hot mess mom character things can slide into an overwhelmed all the time situation. 

We screw up and we make mistakes as mothers. We have our days when we are not at our best, but let’s take that and see how we can grow instead of sharing on social media is it wine o clock yet or thank you Lord it’s bedtime. 

What we focus on is what we become

It can be a slipperly slope to sharing one of those relatable memes to settling into that hot mess mom character. But this isn’t what is best for you. This isn’t what God has for you. This is the world speaking loudly to mediocrity. 

Stive not to be apathetic in your parenting but intentional. Strive to improve everyday even if somedays that just feels exhausting. Apathy can turn into crappy parenting real quick. What kind of example does that show to your kids?

Focus on being the best mom you can be and give yourself grace that you are doing the best you can. Don’t allow the enemy into your head with those whispers of I’m a bad mom,an angry mom or I suck at being a mom I can’t keep it all together. God loves you precious mama and He sees you. He sees your lack of sleep, and the toddler tornado whizzing through the house destroying everything in its sight.  He see’s you teenager being defiant and leaving you feeling depleted. Maybe just maybe this is good for you? This is meant to sanctify you? This is to call you out and up to be better? Not to settle in to what the cultures definition of a hot mess mom is. 

Pinterest Mom or Hot Mess Mom

Attaining perfection seems out of reach and rightly so. It is out of reach. You will never be the perfect mom. We live in a broken world we are sinners raising sinners. We have external pressures weighing heavy on us. So stop scrolling Pinterest or social media feeling guilty by all the ways you are not the Pinterest mom. Your house isn’t perfect, you can’t bake, and you can’t DIY furniture like her. You aren’t supposed to those are not your gifts. Stay in your lane mama and focus on developing your gifts and stewarding what has been entrusted to you.  Don’t automatically swing to the oppisite end of the spectrum and label yourself a hot mess simple because your banana bread sucks. I guarantee there is something you are way better at than her. 

It’s not one or the other and we shouldn’t strive for either we should strive for what God has for us. That is an intentional daily practice of moving what is distracting and overwhelming and focusing on what matters. 

Raise Your Standards

There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ but their is conviction and I ask you to let God convict you in this area. Are you mothering to the glory of God. Are you caring for yourself, your home, your husband and your kids to the glory of God? Are you allowing the sanctification process to make you better or bitter?

Frantic, lazy, chaotic and stressful is not the way we are meant to mother. This affects our spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical health. 

Take these feelings of stress and chaos to the Lord. 



Make Changes

So what are some changes that we can implement so we don’t feel like a hot mess mom? 

It starts with God. Then it means taking ownership. 

Planning Ahead

Scheduling and Tracking

Caring for your body. 

Being intentional with your schedule. Try time blocking. 

Having a goal for your motherhood. I want my kids to remember…

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